France
by Eponine G
Summary: Oliver Twist-Nancy and Bill live and flee to France....
1. Prolouge

Authors note:we have to pretend that the whole world speaks english and that all these people were alive at the same time*  
  
France   
  
Prologue   
  
Charley and Dodger looked on amazed as Nancy emerged from Brownlow's house   
  
"Nancy wouldn't dare have another fella, Bill would kill 'em both" He said more to himself then his companion   
  
"What you reckon she's punting?"   
  
"She ain't punting Charley she's peaching! Now come on we gotta tell Fagin the bad news and I ain't looking forward to that! You know what they say 'bout the messenger!"   
  
"No!" Charley grabbed hold of Dodger with all the force he could muster "I won't do it! We can't peach on Nancy!"   
  
"Well she just peached on us!" With that Dodger administered Charley with a blow to his face and ran in the direction of The Seven Dials while Charley headed for Brownlow's.   
  
Bill stood up, gathered his tools and walked out of Fagin's leaving an evil laugh as he went.   
  
"Bill! Don't be too violent with her Bill!" But even as he said it he knew his words were in vain he turned on Dodger "The one thing we needed was time to get a boat and you have just taken that time away from us!"   
  
"You can get a boat anytime of day or night Fagin you just watch me!" Dodger left leaving Fagin alone with a new feeling in his black heart. It was fear.   
  
He looked around the dank gloomy room as he closed the door and moved the furniture to block any hope of escape or rescue.   
  
He ripped back the curtain and looked on at her peaceful sleeping form and was filled with anger. He had loved her in his own evil way and this was how she repaid him.   
  
"Get up"   
  
"Oh, it's you Bill... I was just dreaming about you" she gave him a flash of a sleepy smile wondering if he would catch on.   
  
"Nightmare was it? Get up!"   
  
She wasn't put off by his rough tone, as it was not unusual for Bill to come back from a job and be out of humor. So she ignored him and made her way to the window to let some light in.   
  
"Leave it be! It's light enough in here for what I've got to do"   
  
Terror struck Nancy's heart "How do you know? Who told you?"   
  
"Never you mind you whore! For you were followed tonight!"   
  
Slipping free of his grasp she ran to the door only to find that it was blocked so spinning round she grabbed hold of him and cried "Bill I ain't told nobody nothing about ya!" With that she kissed him to try and cool his temper "We..we can go away! I was told that tonight ...we can go away and start again"   
  
He pulled away from her grasp and pushed her to the floor in one last final plea she cried to him "We could go to France Bill!"   
  
"What would I wanna go to France for? I don't like the French" He snarled out his last words then pulled out his gun and pressed it against her forehead then he had a vision of people banging at the door as the shot rang out, then he hit Nancy twice over the head with the butt of the gun.   
  
She gathered up all the strength she had left to pull herself up and looked upwards "oh God have mercy!" Then as she saw Bill reach for his club she put her hands over her head and vowed not to cry out.   
  
Bill was about to finish the job at hand when Bullseye's mad barking cleared his head as he looked down onto Nancy's form which was waiting for the next hit.   
  
She felt like she was waiting for eternity for her life to end, her only thoughts were she had inevitably killed him, her death would be his. How she wished he would just do it and finish her when she heard his club drop to the floor and his footsteps moving away from her. She couldn't take it any longer, she blacked out   
  



	2. Chapter 1

Chapter One   
  
"Bill?" I heard my own groggy voice and wondered if I was alive or in some higher place. The whole of my body ached finally feeling the effect of Bill's hands from hours before.   
  
"Your alive then? Shame that."   
  
So I was alive or was it Hell? I opened my eyes to look around and the sight that welcomed me truly made me wonder if the was Hell! This is what I saw: It was a dark and gloomy place, not unlike the usual places in which I dwell but it was made all the worse by the amount of people in this dark and gloomy place. It was absolutely packed there wasn't room to swing a flea let alone a cat. Men, woman and children from newborn to young adults were crammed in to this place from end to end it was no wonder there wasn't any light, there was scarcely room for air. And the smell! Needless to say I am accustomed to the smell of poverty, destitution and the hardships of life but with lack of light and air it was just too much even for me and I felt the bile rise in my throat and rolled over to release it.   
  
"Don't even think about it" Bill pushed me back away from him and I had no other choice then to urge the feeling to be sick back down to the pit of my stomach.   
  
I looked to the other side and there was Fagin muttering something about this being worse than The Dials and next to him, to my surprise, Dodger who was fast asleep.   
  
"Morning my dear. You've been out cold for a few days; still it's good you are awake huh? Not long now Nance and we will be there"   
  
"How can you tell it's morning?" I asked with an attempt of a smile from my swollen lips "Where are we going? When did Dodger get here?"   
  
"Well you said we could go to France did you not? And Dodger found us the boat, he were waiting for us my dear.. Look at us!" Fagin shook his head with disbelieve "We ruled The Dials and now we are reduced to four sad bodies."   
  
I looked around seeing that there were indeed only us four and Charley was no where to be seen. "Charley?"   
  
Th old man sighed and actually looked saddened "'Tis a shame really is. Charley was one of the best, my dear, the best! But what is the first rule of this world we live in?"   
  
"Not to peach, squeak, to tell tales or it's the hang mans rope" Bill's voice was very quiet and unusually soft "what's done had to be done. No more talk of it d'ya hear?"   
  
It all made sense. Poor Charley! He was such a nice lad. Well nice as was possible in our game. A cruel part of me wished it were Charley next to Fagin and not Dodger.   
  
"Bill what did he-"   
  
"I said no more!" The gruffness had returned "Now shut your mouth before I shut it permanently."   
  
The rest of the journey was done in silence.   
  



	3. Chapter 2

Chapter Two   
  
"I hope you know where you are going, you scheming old fence"   
  
"I always know Bill always my dear!"   
  
The slums of Paris were where we were walking through now. Well Bill was dragging me as I still felt ill and half dead but still having my pride refused Dodger's offer to be carried.   
  
We came to a tumbled down house that, without a second glance could have been identical to the one we left behind in London.   
  
Fagin knocked on the door then muttered through a hatch that opened "Tell them its an old...friend"   
  
Seconds later the door opened and we made our way inside.   
  
There sitting in the furthest corner was a man younger than Fagin but older than Bill who greeted Fagin with much enthusiasm and then a woman with hair the colour of flame came rushing forward towards me and then circled me like a vulture.   
  
"And what" she bellowed to the man at the table "Am I supposed to do with this?! Look at the state of her! Why it will be a week or so before I can even tell what she looks like let alone what group to put her in!"   
  
Having heard this talk before from various pimps over the years I started to back away but bumped into Bill who once again it seemed was blocking my escape.   
  
"Why, She is as timid as a mouse!" Then glancing up at Bill she started to bellow again "You own her at the moment do you? Well I hope you weren't expecting to much for the trade off of her, even I treat my girls better than that! But thn you always were a rough one"   
  
Always? Did she know him?   
  
I looked round at Bill to see if he was gonna defend me or if I was gonna have to shout at the woman my self and saw he was glaring at her with a very distasteful look in his eye. He then marched up to the man sitting at the table grabbed hold of his collar and said in a low and threatening voice "Call your woman off will you before I put her out of her misery"   
  
A sudden dawning hit the man as he looked up to Bill "Mr. Sikes how nice it is to be in your company again" Bill's grip on the man relaxed   
  
"Thenardier I see your still in the sorry state you were 3 years ago."   
  
Just then the door flew open and in bounded a girl of no more than 14 summers and cried "Your here! Oh I've missed you so!" And with that she ran over to Bill and flung around her arms around   



	4. Chapter 3

Chapter Three   
  
Bill disentagled the girl from his neck   
  
"Alright alright d'yer wanna strangle me the moment I walk in?"   
  
"Oh no of course I don't!" The girl hastily removed herself from Bill and cast a glance over at me then back to him. "You've been gone 3 months! I didn't think you were ever coming back!"   
  
"Well I'm here now ain't I?!" Bill was looking at me all the while as he was talking to her   
  
Who the hell was she? And why did she seem even more at ease with Bill then I did? And why was he looking as gulity as sin?   
  
I was dying to ask these questions but didn't get a chance to-well this is what I told my self-in truth I didn't want to know the answers.   
  
"Well" said the young girl "You have been in the wars!" then turning to Bill"Do you know who did this? How can anyone be so cruel? Even Da wouldn't go this far"   
  
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. What did she think Bill was? An angel? At that moment Fagin pulled away from the man known as Thenardier and walked up to me "Well my dear, I see you have met Azelma. Alzelma this is Nancy....Alzelma..Nancy my dear is...well she's-"   
  
"My wife"   
  
Theose words were uttered so quietly that I wasn't sure I head them but one look at Bill's face told me I had.   
  
I often read penny romances from the market when the day is over and venders want to shift their goods. They are full of sayings like "At that moment her world stopped" or "It didn't seem true time stopped for her" And I had always wondered whether they had any truth in them. Now I know they do. The sickness I had held down since the boat journey wouldn't be held any more and I made my escape to th door in which we had entered, out onto the street and released into the gutter.   
  
I sat down giving into my legs demand that thy could no longer hold my weight. 3 months she said he had been gone. 3 months ago Fagin had come and told me Bill had been shopped by the scuffers and was up at Newgate in solitude. Fagin! He had lied too! How many more did Dodger know? Damn Bill Sikes to Hell! He knew how I felt about him! God knows I'd told him enough and he had told me too in the early hours of the morning. Did he truely have no heart?   
  
I was so busy in my thoughts I didn't hear him open the door. I only knew he was there when he sat down next to me.   
  
"Nance if it helps I didn't know either"   
  
"It doesn't Dodge but thanks all the same"   
  
"You know good can come of this-now Bill knows you know you could get away from him, start again you could go anyway and he wouldn't care!"   
  
"That's just it you see he wouldn't but I want him to. You said I could be anywhere- yopu know where I'd be? I'd be in that gloomy room called home still laying on that floor-dead I should be dead you know."   
  
"He met her three years ago when she was 15"   
  
15? so she was 17 same age as me...she looked young for her age...maybe I just looked old. I didn't tell Dodger to continue but I hadn't told him to stop so he carried on.   
  
"They wed last year you know when you were taken ill and Bill had us tll you that he had a spell of six months"   
  
Ill. Yes I remember. I had miscarried and told Dodger to get word to Bill that I couldn't see him 'cause I was "ill" So there was me half dead and he was geting married! I felt the tars spill over my eyes and on to my bruised cheeks and brushd them away for far of Dodger seing them.   
  
"Poor Nance" he said,voice full of pity "He didn't tell ya well coz he is truely fond of ya-that's why he brought you with us he said you didn't deserve to lay rotting in that room coz you had been good to him no matter what he did to ya"   
  
Yes damn right I had! I had taken the drunkedness, the orders, the dirty looks and the beatings! Beatings I took for disobeying or for food being too cold or too hot. Beatings for getting him a drink or not getting him a drink. Beatings for saying somthing or breathing too loadly. Beatings for just simpley being in the same place as he was.   
  
"Some repayment" I muttered the statement under my breath but Dodger had heard it   
  
"He never meant to hurt ya Nance but it were agreed that if Bill took 'Zelma off of Thenardier's hands then he wouldn't shop us all to the french scuffers. Fagin did some dodgy business 'ere last year and well Thenardir used it to his advantage. So it's a sham marriage really you see?"   
  
"Not a sham to her though is it? Or me."   
  
If all this was true why hadn't Bill just told me too clear of last year? I would hav left-returned to me old trade, sure I would have been hurt but nothing to what I was feeling now.   
  
"So what you gonna do?"Dodger asked me the question as if I had lost a job not my life.   
  
"I ...I dunno I'm not staying here thats for sure I think I'll-"   
  
"You ain't going anywhere." Bill's voice was harsh and menacing "You are gonna get off your backside go in there and tell 'em you will earn you can earn your keep by picking pockets and the like"   
  
This was the last straw did he think I was gonna take that from him now after what I had just been through?!   
  
"I shall not" I said shaking my head defiantly and stayed wher I am.Dodger looked at Bill shrugged his shoulders and headed inside.   
  
"Get up and get in there d'ya hear?"   
  
I stood up and looked Bill in the eye and said in a calm controlled voice "If you think I'm gonna walk in there and pretend everything is fine you got another thing coming. Fagin warned me that you had no heart and now I know it's true. I'm gonna do somthing I never dared do before I'm going to walk away from you Bill Sikes and you will never lay a hand on me again"   
  
Well I turned away from him almost walked, but not quite. Needless to say he he didn't comply to the last bit of my galant speech.....   
  
  
  



	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4  
  
3 Months. I have been in this bloody rotten place for 3 months! Dodger had left after 1st. Well not really left but joined up with the rest of Thenardiers gang and so I don't see him any more.  
Fagin is scouting out boys and girls in Paris trying to start up the same kind of game he had going at hampton court so he is never around either.  
So that leaves me with Mme. Thenardier, Azelma...and Bill.  
Each night in this place was the same for the first two months will he go to me or her? Will he ask me to cook his dinner or her? The only thing that I didn't wonder about was who would he hit....for some reason I always got...correction get the short straw in that area.  
But now I don't wonder who does what coz she dos it all andI...well I do what I only know how to do apart from steal. It's the same trade anywhere in the word the only difference being the names....In England you were a whore, a slut or, for the more classier gentleman, a prostitute. Here the name whore remains but I know a couple of new ones I'm no longer a slut but a lovely lady and no longer a prostitue but a painted lady. How the term lady can be applied to this trade I don't know. I meet a Lady once Miss Rose Flemming her name was to think of her and me sharing the same title makes me shudder!  
  
So here I am wondering the streets of Paris-when I get asked who I belong to I have to say "I'm one of Mme. Thenardier's Lovely (or painted)Ladys" It's strange saying that coz in London you just walk the streets and kep all the takings.   
  
London I miss it you know. I miss hearing the "Alright luv?" and "Spare some blunt Guv".  
The sun has gone down now time for work to begin.  
  
"Hello there my lovely I know you from somewhere don't I?"  
  
Oh God. To turn around or not turn around. I wouldn't of turned around if the calling of gin hadn't entered my mind.  
  
"Oh Brujon... I...didn't see you there" If there was one man I despised it was this one. I gave him a smile the best I could manage and prayed that he wasn't "in the mood" Unfortunately it seemed I didn't deserve to have my prayers answered.  
  
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"Well that was fun don't you think?" I looked up at Brujon who still had his hands either side of me on the wall and whos face was still flushed from the task he'd just undertook and I was filled with disgust for him and for myself.  
"Oh yeah just hilarious"  
"Oi watch it my girl I pay your wages and don't you forget it!" His face came even closer to mine as he smirked at me   
"Same place sometime no doubt" And with that he grinned then swaggered down the street as blokes do when they've forefilled their duty as a man, even if it was up against a wall.  
So here I was still against the wall and wondring why the hell I was back where I started all them years ago. With a final arrangement to my dress I heard the coins clink in my pocket and I knew all to well why I had done it. The call of Gin had returned and I was off like a shot to the inn.  
  
  



	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5  
"Whiskey here, whiskey there  
Whiskey almost everywhere  
Whiskey up and whiskey down  
Whiskey all around the town  
Whiskey killed me poor old dad  
Whiskey drove me mother mad  
My wife and I do not agree  
She puts whiskey in her tea"  
  
  
Was the song that greated me as I entered the inn. A good old favourite of Dodger's...and Charley's none other then the "O Whiskey" chant. I made my way through the crowd ordered a jug of gin and made me way over to a table.  
  
I can't of been sitting there for more than 10 minutes before they entered. A group of students, nothing special about any of them- except one he was very nice indeed! Blonde haired and blue eyes, you know there are days when my trade ain't so bad after all. Just a couple more drinks and I'd make my way over there.....  
  
Right the jug is empty and we are now all on the last verse of "O Whiskey" So up I get and walk, well stumble the ground ain't as stable as it was when I came in, and join in the song as I make my way over to where my next job may sit.  
  
"If whiskey was a river and I could swim  
I'd say here goes and dive right in  
If whiskey was a river and I was a duck  
I'd dive to the bottom and never come up  
I wisht I knew where whiskey grew  
I'd eat the leaves and the branches too  
A tot of whiskey all around  
And a bottle full for the shanty man"  
  
Clapping has errupted my ears are ringing and the students are all quite drunk especially the worst looking one....steer clear of him girl-if I keep telling myself that I may just remeber it.  
I walk right up to the bunch and a few start to whistle this is great I'll make a pretty penny...wait no...franc tonight!   
"Well you look like a fine young lad....but your all alone, maybe I could be a bit of assistance!" I went to sit on his lap but judged the distance wrong and would of hit th floor if he hadn't of caught me  
"Careful Miss...erm...thanks for the offer but no thanks I'm not into...that"  
The dissappointment must have shown in my face because all his mates started jeering at him  
"Go on Enjolras it's time you got some!" One of them shouted leaving the rest, and myself, in laughter  
"Yeah going Enj shes up for it with you...just like every other woman in the city is!" This lead to another round of laughter and I decided I should really get this lad-he could be a big tipper students always were.  
"Oh a catch are you then? Good job I only have the best then ain't it?!"  
"Really...thanks for the offer but I really don't think-"  
"Oh come on Enj your not up for anything unless its for the republic are you?!" more jeers came and I was praying that his compainions could change his mind. Then the bloke in the corner who was just...well worse then Brujon and not very sober either."Feuilly did you not hear him? He said no! Now leave him and his republic alone. But.." his eyes turned to me and I swear he drooled like a dog "I'll give you a go if you like a nice young thing like you can't be left unattended."  
"Sorry" I said standing up way to quick and losing my balnce once again then regaining it I looked at this...thing in the corner "But I don't do animals"  
With that another roar of laughter consumed the table.   
"Never mind Grantaire! There is always someone whos willing but looks like this one knows a dog when she sees one!"  
Ah so the creature had a name. Grantaire looked at the one who had shouted the comment-the one who had earlier been named Feuilly and shouted back at him "She will be mine!"  
"Oh I don't think so love for now I'm going home sorry to disappoint." And with that I stumbled out of the inn and into another.  
  



	7. Chapter 6

Chapter 6  
  
She heard him long before she saw him. His foot steps clinking on the pavement i time with hers.  
She quickened her pace best she could but the drink had got the better of her and she stumbled on the cobbles landing on the floor.  
He was beside her in a second his foul smelling breath felt hot on her neck. She tried to push him off but he was too strong and she was to drunk.  
  
He took her right there in the middle of the dark alley.  
It wasnt the first time it had happened to her, she knew she should just lie and wait for him to be done, but the drink made her mind foggy and she cried out, kicking and hitting  
him. He hit her back twice as hard.  
  
Why was this happening to her? had she had enough bad luck for a while? she gave up the struggle and lay still once more, the tatse of her own blood fresh in her mouth.  
She tried to block out the pain with images of Bill but nothing helped, she cried out again in protest but it only earned her another slap.  
  
Then it was over, the man muttereing something and giving her a kick for good measue.  
She was alone again, the effect of the drink and the shock washed over her as she passed out.  
  



	8. Chapter 7

Chapter 7  
  
  
She could her voices....laughter...a man...a woman...  
She tried to sit up, red hot pain seering through her...  
She remebered the man....the attack....he had beat her afterwards...the foggy memories clouded her mind.  
She sank back down laying her head on the pavement. She couldnt be bothered with life anymore.  
  
  
The people were getting closer to her... their footsteps loud as they echoed on the pavement.  
  
  
  
"Poor girl" the woman said. "We should help her."  
"Leave her"  
she reconized the mans voice but where from?  
  
"Bill have a heart!"  
With a sigh the man knealt down next to her "You alright girl? Looks like you've- Nancy!"  
  
He was here! Bill was here with her and Nancy knew everything would be fine once more. She tried to smile but couldnt.  
Then she was in his arms and he was carrying her like a small child, protecting her from the world.  
She was happy.  
  
Bill couldn't believe what he was seeing. He's Nancy in such a state! He would look after her, he would never leave her again. 


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8  
  
  
Nancy opened her eyes and was greeted by his smiling face, with a hint of concern on it.  
  
"Welcome back. What happened Nance?"  
"What do you think happened? What usually happens to whores" She muttered through swollen lips.  
"Any idea who it was?"  
"No" resting her head against the pillow she took his hand in hers. "Bill I missed ya"  
"I missed you too. Ill look after you Nance I promise.  
  
A warm feeling of being wanted engulfed Nancy. She was back with Bill. He was smiling, he was promising to look after her, everythin would be fine.  
He leaned foward placing an affectionae kiss on her lips, she winced but smiled and went to return it.  
  
A knock interupted both of their plans.  
"Oh your awake! We were a bit worried weren't we Bill?"  
  
Nancy looked at Alzelma, everything hitting home at once. Thing would never be the same, he was married.  
  
"How are you feeling?"  
"Fine" she said in a flat emotioneless voice.  
"Good, your welcome here as long as you need a bed" With that Alzelma left as quickly as she entered.  
  
"Nance..."  
  
She turned to face the wall "Go away Bill. Everytime you get my hopes up, you always make promises you cant keep"  
"I'll keep this one Nance...I Love ya" It was a pathetic attempt to win back her trust, he knew but he meant it.  
  
Taking her hand in his he kissed it, then her lips and she threw her arms around his neck. Things may not be great she thought but its a start. 


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter 9  
  
Two weeks since the attack and Nancy was almost recovered. Despite Bill's questions she continued to remain mystifid about her attacker.  
But of course she knew who it was. She had known the momnt the pain and foggyness had left her head. But he would never know if she had her way.  
  
  
But all thoughts of the rape were far from her mind now as in her arms was Bill. They were laughing and kissing then Nancy suddenly stopped and pulled away much to Bill's frastration.  
"What's up?" He said sharply.  
"Nothing...Well..Bill you do love me dont ya?"  
" For God sake....Nancy what are we doing? I'm in your bed ain't I?!"  
"So .. back to normal then? that means we can leave right? Go back to London?"  
"Nope." he answered quickly and tryed to finish where he left off but one again she pushed him off.   
"Nope? Why bloody not? there's nothing for you here...for us here...is there?"  
"Look....I cant up and leave what about this deal with Thenardier? You want me to break it?!"  
"Oh come off it! You could kill him with one hand tied behind your back!."  
"Yeah and be hung for it"  
"You sound like Fagin now. You know you could and we could leave!"She was desprate she hated it here knowing he was married....to her."there's something else ain't there?"  
"Well I'm fond of Zelma shes a good kid"  
Nancy's rage built up "Fond? Fond?! What the bloody hell does that mean?! You have to chose me or her. You can't have both."  
"'Course I can. I'm Bill Sikes."  
And with that he kissed her to shut her up and left Nancy feeling as miserable as ever.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
3 months since the last attack and 3 months and 2 weeks since the first. He'd got her again when she was alone and drunk leaving Nancy thinking "why me?" It wasn't violent...she didn't dare move that time.  
She had tried and tried to block him from her mind. Tried to gt rid of his image every time she closed her eyes. An attacker had never affected her like this before but then, an attacker had never left her pregnant before.  
  
Ever since Nancy was young, well that is to say younger, she had wanted a baby, but ever since she was young Bill had been there and he didn't want any kids. His reasons were good enough. She remebered it like it was yesterday, the chat they had had over two years ago.  
  
  
"Bill, wouldn't it be great to have kids?"  
He looked at her as if she was insane...she couldn't see the look as she was washing up and he was preparing gear for the job but she could feel the look boring in to her back.  
"Oh yeah bloody marverlous! Screaming at all hours, just like next doors lot, not having nough food for any of us, extra clothes, we'd need extra space, not to mention-"  
She sighed and cut him off before he could continue "A simple 'No' would of done."  
"Sorry Nance, but do you really wanna bring a kid into this? I was a kid in this, you were a kid in this, would you wish it on anyone given the choice?"  
She laughed to cover up the heartache she felt inside "So Mr. Sikes does have a heart then"   
He mumbled something incoherent to her then added "Besides if you had a kid I'd be out of here in a shot" With that he stood up called bullseye and left.  
  
  
So all her life Nancy had had to choose between Bill and the chance of children. And everytime she fell pregnant she had made her choice by throwing herself down the stairs or going to see Old Sally the well known old maid where she would "deal" with your "problem". Untill now.  
For now she didn't have Bill...not really but she did have a baby. A baby who refused to budge even though she had tried countless things that woman of her trade were taught.  
The babys father didn't bother her. For it wasn't the pippins fault that its dad was a foul creature. Besides the foul creature wouldn't know of the babe. It would be just it and her alone but together.   
A world without Bill. 


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter 10  
  
The pains were getting closer together and more violent. Those pains that were all to familiar but broke her heart once more each time she felt them. Each one gripped her stomach like a force of strength – each one brought the life inside her closer to its end.  
  
Nancy rested her clammy forehead against the cool stone wall of the alleyway. Five months she had carried. The longest she had ever had a child inside her and she bloomed too as the knowledge that she would finally have someone who would give her unconditional love was no longer a fantasy but a reality that drew nearer with each day.  
  
The hot salty tears ran down her cheeks unchecked as the reality slowly and painfully turned back to a fantasy. She didn't care anymore. As another spasm of pain gripped her she slid to the pavement and into the gutter. "The gutter" she thought, "Where nothings like me belong"  
  
The past 5 months hadn't been too bad. She had found work in an inn that had paid its way. The hardest part was leaving him. She couldn't stay there with Bill, she hadn't even told him why or where she was going. She had said bye in the morning and didn't come back. Bill. Why did she love him? Why after all that had happened after all that he had done would she run back at a drop of a hat? It wasn't love, really. How can someone say they are in love when they have never been loved to begin with?  
  
Another pain came and she thought her body would tear in two. This is it she thought here in the gutter how fitting to die where you were born.  
  
The hands came down as if the heavens had opened up. She heard someone scream his name. It was her she was calling out for him. Where was he? All she ever wanted was to be in his arms but as per usual he was not there. It was then Nancy realized it was her who was screaming, her that was calling out for him.  
  
But this wasn't him. The man who's arms went around her and called for help this wasn't what she wanted. She was going to die she could sense it. A feeling of immense peace and happiness surrounded her-the only time she had felt like this was when Bill had took her home that fatal night when she decided enough was enough and it had to end. She was all ready she had had the dirty piece of glass in her hand and was examining her snow white wrist when he had found her and put his arms around her. Then she had felt happy because someone cared.  
  
  
  
  
  
The next thing she knew she was in a bed with clean…she checked again yes clean bedding! The feeling that something was missing suddenly engulfed her and her hand went instantly to her stomach. She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream, shout and sob hysterically and beat the walls and let the world know that life wasn't fair! But nothing for she had no tears left. She felt empty and dead inside. She gazed up at the ceiling of the room she was in. Why was she being punished? Why could she just not die and be done with it? What pleasure was some higher being getting seeing her life being ripped to shreds?   
  
Just then her thoughts on life and death were interrupted by the door to the room being carefully opened and in stepped a young man. She knew him. He had been in the pub that night…. That night when…  
  
"Morning mademoiselle" He greeted her with a gentle smile but eyes full of concern.  
  
She smiled back but it did not reach her eyes.  
  
"I'm Nicholas Feuilly I believe we have already met once in an inn when you gave one of my friends a run for his money" He chuckled at the memory.  
  
"Yeah I remember" No laugh, no smirk not even a smile.  
  
Feuilly regarded this young girl in his bed. She was pretty but could be beautiful but life had dealt her some blows judging from the state he had found her in. And her eyes. They were the worse he forced himself to look into them when he spoke to her but inwardly shuddered at the empty look in them. They reminded him of the eyes of a dead dog he had seen in the street. They were dead eyes that's what was so errie about her she was like a corpse.  
  
Nancy studied the young man hovering in the doorway. Was tall, not as tall as Bill but he wasn't what she would call short. He had dark brown hair and soft gentle brown eyes. She knew he was summing up her appearance just as she was his and she decided it was time she was off a day off the streets was a day out of the pub as far as she was concerned.  
  
"Well thanks for the bed but I gotta be off you know I can't afford to send two days off the street"  
  
"Two days? You have been here for two weeks we didn't think you'd make it but against the odds you pulled through thank god Joly would have lost it if he's first real patient had died!" A look of horror crossed his face " Oh god Im sorry! I didn't mean for it to sound like that I mean I was supposed to say that-"  
  
"It's ok" Nancy smiled at the young mans rambling but once again Feuilly noticed the eyes stayed blank "I know what you meant all the same I'll be on me way" She went to move and felt a wave of sickness come over her and collapsed back against the pillow. He was there in a second sat next to her on the bed.  
  
"You aren't well, there's no need to rush off you can stay here as long as you like- there is only me here and well it will be nice to have a woman's touch around the place."  
  
In an instant Nancy's mind went back 3 years it all replayed in her mind as if it was yesterday.  
  
  
  
"Nance" as he said her name he took her small hands in his rough ones "why don't you stay here? I know I ain't always here and it's no the Ritz or anything but I couldn't bare to see to you on the streets again." He hesitated saying stuff like this weren't easy for him, he weren't the kind of bloke who wore his heart on his sleeve and she saw it. She took her hands out of his and wrapped them around his neck "Bill…I..I dunno what to say"  
  
"Yes might be a good start" He said with a laugh   
  
"Yes if you'll have me"  
  
The laughter went from his eyes  
  
"Nance you gotta keep quiet though you hear? What I do it could send me to the gallows and a few more beside if I thought I couldn't trust ya I would slit your throat lord knows I've done worse."  
  
"But you do trust me don't you? You wouldn't ask me to live in would you if you didn't?"  
  
Bill looked down into her eyes and saw they were sparkling what had he done to deserve a treasure like her?  
  
"Nah your right I wouldn't" and with that he kissed her and Nance knew this was the start of her life.  
  
The image of her happier days faded and the need to be with Bill increased but the fear of history repeating itself was greater  
  
" Thanks but I shall be off me regulars will be wondering where I am"  
  
Nicholas's face dropped then and a flash of confusion  
  
"You talk about it as if your proud of being a… a"  
  
"Whore go on say it its easy"  
  
"You talk about it as if it's normal as if it's something you are brought up in!" What was wrong with him? He could feel himself getting in a rage this was so unlike him! And what for? This girl who he had only met twice but then hadn't he cared for her for two weeks non stop?  
  
She laughed a bitter laugh "Well of course I do stupid for haven't I been doing it since I was 10? 7 years that is almost half me life as a whore." She laughed bitterly which was really a laugh of desperation.  
  
"Don't use that word it isn't a word for ladies to use" He wanted to help her why couldn't she see that? Give her a chance to better herself. He didn't know why or what made him want to do this but it needed to be done!  
  
"Ladies ha! Where is she then?" At this Nance staggered off the bed and proceeded to look under it" Lady? Here lady lady!"  
  
"Nancy…I , I had just meant that.. whore isn't a good word and you shouldn't use it"  
  
"For God's sake!!!" She screamed the words straight at him the empty eyes now blazing like fire "Why do people get a complete thrill by telling me what to do?I shall say what I like! Whore Whore Whore Whore Whore Whore!" Each time she said the word she became loader and took another step towards nicholas and he took another step back.  
  
"Nancy...you are not well" What on earth had happened to this poor girl? "Sit down and we can talk about this"  
  
"See! There you go again telling me what to do! I am perfectly fine!" And with that she broke down sobbing in a heap on the floor leaving Nicholas dazed and confused.  
  
He kneeled down and went to put his arms round her but she pulled away and sat up wrapping her arms around her knees trying to protect herself from the world  
  
"Let me help you, please, that is, if you want me to help you."  
  
"But I don't want you I want him." The fire left her eyes and was replaced by the haunted emptiness again.  
  
Just then came a knock on the door.   
  
Nicholas got up, opened the door and was met by Courfeyrac who had a huge grin on his face and simply said "You don't half pick them well!"  
  
Nicholas slammed the door shut to the echo of Courfeyrac's laughter.  



	12. Chapter 11

Chapter 11  
  
Try as he might Nicholas could not comfort Nancy. It was not that he didn't want to for he was a caring person but it was she that would not let him near her.  
  
He knew he couldn't keep her here by force but she had made no attempt to move so he did not offer to help her leave. He liked having her in the room and had this unbelievable urge to help her.  
  
He glanced over to her where she was sitting on the bed still hunched up with her back against the wall as if trying to protect herself from something. He was racking his brains in order to think of some way he could help her, just a smile or to talk anything to get her out of the daze she was in. He didn't want to call a doctor as one look at her and they would sign her off to the asylums and Joly would be scared of catching something. He knew she wasn't insane though it was something else… some deep hurt or pain that had finally exploded inside her. For a few minutes earlier when she was shouting he saw a glimpse of her past. She had been ordered around and mistreated. Also there was someone she cared about very much. Him. But who was him?   
  
Nancy sat there in the room with Nicholas. She hugged her aching body longing for the pain to stop longing for her broken heart to be mended longing for the emptiness where her child once lay to be gone and longing to feel wanted, needed and not alone. She could feel Nicholas watching her. She wasn't alone but she was lonely. Nicholas had tried to put his arms around her, tried to comfort her but it just reminded her of all the punters she had had it felt so very false. Only one persons arms didn't feel false and his arms were no doubt around some one else. She couldn't stop the tears spill over her eyes. Why hadn't he killed her in the room in old Nicole Street that night? Or why did she ever go to Mr. Brownlow and confide in him about Monks. And why did Fagin send Charley and Dodger to spy on her? And why did she try to help Oliver Twist? And why did she love Bill so much when he hated her so much? All these questions whirled round and round in Nancy's head but no answers came. Just like the happiness and love and the feeling of being wanted never came.  
  
A knock at the door interrupted both their thoughts.   
  
"Feuilly? You are going to be late and you know what Enjolras is like!" A laugh came from behind the door "Grantaire says you must beware of the Enjolras glare!"  
  
Nicholas smiled and opened the door "Really Joly anyone would think you were humoring our great leader and starting to like Grantaire!" At this both men laughed then Joly caught sight of Nancy.  
  
"Oh the patient is still here?" He cast a questioning look at Feuilly but got no answer "How are you feeling now?" he asked with a friendly smile but all he got in return was a blank look from vacant eyes. "That good?" he said with a smirk but concern was also in his voice. Nicholas decided it was best divert Joly away from Nancy so picked a topic that always won out with him. "Talking of health how are you Joly?"  
  
With this Joly's concern changed to one of self-pity "You know I do believe I'm coming down with…"  
  
Nicholas ushered Joly out of the room and Nancy listened as their voices faded down the corridor.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
The sound of laughter woke her from her sleep. It had been a very peaceful sleep as Bill was in her dreams, loving her, protecting her from the pain and hurt she felt.  
  
The voices became louder and she sat up and resumed her former position with her knees drawn up against her chest.  
  
The door opened and in walked Nicholas with the handsome blonde student that she had been after all those months ago.  
  
"Nancy" Feuilly slurred her name and she could tell in an instant that he had been drinking "This  
  
is my friend and comrade Enjolras"  
  
Enjolras looked at the girl huddled on the bed. He remembered her from the inn but she had been different then now she looked like a frightened animal. "Hi nice to meet you. I am afraid Feuilly here has had a little too much too drink tonight so I helped him home. But I'm sure he will be fine in your capable hands" he said with a grin and she knew exactly what that grin entailed.   
  
For the first time since her outburst Nancy spoke "Well I…I was just leaving."  
  
"Bloody hell!" Feuilly exploded as only a drunk does "I have been trying to get her to talk all day and you say hello and she talks back! It's a miracle!" Then he collapsed in a snoring heap on the floor.  
  
"Not used to the drink then?" Nancy enquired. Seeing this man again bought her back to reality. She realized she couldn't mope forever things could be a lot worse. How they could she didn't know but there must be someone.  
  
"No he isn't I think he has a lot on his mind"  
  
"Ain't we all. I gotta go. Nice meeting you…again." Nancy made her way down the hall way and then the stairs at the bottom she heard a familiar voice.   
  
"I'm telling you he has got some one and it's driving him to drink!"  
  
The came another voice it was the one they called Grantaire  
  
"No Courfeyrac" he slurred " It's when you haven't got one you drink!!"  
  
This was followed by more laughter and then Nancy left the building and didn't look back  
  
  
  



	13. Chapter 12

Chapter 12  
  
5 months since he had last seen her. Each month she had been gone his fear of her death had increased making his blood boil and his anger surge. He had belted Azelma he didn't know how many times now. He had hit Azelma because she wasn't Nance.   
  
He wasn't an emotional man but he did have a heart. He remembered once when they had first came to this country Nancy had told him he didn't have one but if he didn't then why did he feel so strongly about her and why was he, yes he Bill Sikes, scared that he lost her forever.  
  
The place had got worse since she left. Nance seemed to bring in a ray of light with her especially when she smiled and he saw the love she held for him in her eyes. He had hated her when Fagin had told him that she had peached. He had wanted to bust her skull open, to make her feel the pain she had caused him by breaking his trust. But when it had come down to it and he had to administer that fatal blow he couldn't do it. He couldn't end the life that had brought so much joy to his own.  
  
When Fagin had told him he had to marry Azelma he had it the roof He had held Fagin's neck in a vice like grip and threatened to end the old fence's life there and then. That was until the old miser reminded Sikes that if he didn't do it, it would be him who would soon feel the vice like grip of the hang mans rope around his own neck.  
  
So he had married her and Azelma Thenardier had become Azelma Sikes. The name didn't sit well with him though. He should of married Nance when he had the chance. Nancy Sikes sounded much better he thought.  
  
The cry of the baby brought Bill back to reality. "Bloody kid" he muttered under his breath. Nancy had always wanted kichen and he had denied it her worried that the loss of them would finish her off like it had done for his mother. But now not only was he a husband but a father too, to Emily Sikes. Another girl to look after he thought. The babies cries increased and then came the rough voice of Madame Thenardier, Azelma confined to her bed due to a rather vicious blow from Bill.  
  
Bill looked at the open doorway and considered his options. It was either a life tied to a wife he despised and a screaming baby or the gallows. He would take his chance with the hangman. He left.  



	14. Chapter 13

Chapter 13  
  
  
  
"There you are!"   
  
Nancy put the apple she was about to steal back on the stand and turned round only to see Nicholas.  
  
"I have been worried about you!" The relief he had felt when he had seen her at the market stall had been unbelieveable. She looked very ill. She was thin and wan and her skin had an almost translusante effect to it. The eyes were still empty it was as if she had had her very soul sucked out of her.  
  
"You just left with out word…without a trace 3 days I've been searching!"  
  
"Well now you've found me so what do you want?"  
  
Why was she being like this? "What do I want? I want to know that you are safe and well so why don't you come to the Musain with me and we can have a meal and talk about an arrangement?" He smiled in effort to persuade her but to no avail.  
  
"For a start no one asked you to come looking for me I'm not some lost puppy in the street. Second I cant afford to pay for a meal at the Musain and I ain't gonna take charity and third I know all about arrangements and they usually consist of you will share your house if I share your bed been there and done it, it don't work" this whole speech was in a flat toned voice that had no emotion and it reflected on the way she felt.  
  
"Nance…"  
  
"Don't call me that my name is Nancy" She hated Nance it reminded her too much of him.   
  
Nicholas looked taken aback by this remark but carried on all he same   
  
"Sorry Nancy, I don't want anything from you just the same as you don't want anything from me. I just want to help you. I don't know why but I just feel this need to make your life better. I understand that you've had a hard life and I know what being alone is like. But if we sick together as friends we won't be alone will we?"  
  
"You ain't gonna let up are you?"  
  
"Nope" he said with a boyish grin  
  
"But you have to let me pay my way"  
  
"But…erm…" at this Nicholas went as red as the apple that Nancy had been holding earlier   
  
She sighed and laughed a sound that was music to his ears.  
  
"Not like that I can get a job round here" she said looking round the market. He wasn't sure she was strong enough but agreed anyway. "Deal" he said with a smile  
  
"Deal" she smiled back.  
  
  
  
A month had passed and Nancy was as content as she could be without Bill. She had made friends with all the students for she had found out that's what they all were and her and Nicholas had become good friends.  
  
It was late and Nicholas had returned from the usual ABC meetings.  
  
Nicholas had loved every minute of the past month true she had not told him anything of her past and he still wasn't allowed to call her Nance but these were minor things. She got on well with all his friends particulally Courfeyrac which worried him no end as Courfeyrac had a reputaion with the ladys but as Nancy kept reminding him she wasn't a lady. The one thing he was worried about most though were his feelings for the young woman who now shared his room.  
  
As the weeks passed Nicholas had wanted her more and more. In just four weeks he had felt like he had known her all her life. But try as he might to hint at the way he felt Nancy showed no interest in returning his affections.  
  
He turned the key in the door as quiet as he could in fear of waking her should she be asleep only to find her sitting at the table with an empty bottle of gin in her hand. She smiled at him and waved the empty bottle "Hullo darlin' I got a bit bored so thoughts to entertain meself"   
  
He walked towards her anger in his eyes how could she let herself get in this state? And why?   
  
She saw the anger in his eyes and then it was not Nicholas she saw but Bill. Oh God not again she thought. She got up rather unsteadily and stumbled back over the chair and on to the floor she put her hands over her head and much to Feuilly's amazement started crying and pleading with him  
  
"Please…Please don't thrash me again I couldn't bear it I know I said I'd never do it again but…I were so lonely Bill!"  
  
Nicholas stopped dead. He was only going over to talk to her and the next thing he knew she was begging him not to beat her. And she called him Bill  
  
She lay sobbing quietly to herself and muttering incoherent random thoughts and Nicholas bent down to help her and was left wondering once more what she had been through and also wondering left him wondering who was Bill?   
  
  
  
He couldn't sleep. He glanced over to where the drunken girl who had captured his heart slept. For that was what she had done. He smiled to himself as the truth registered that he, Nicholas Feuilly, was in love! Now he knew why Marius bounded around like a puppy because he wanted to do exactly the same! The smile vanished. But would she have him? Could she accept him into her heart? God he hoped so he couldn't live ithout her. He hated leaving her in the morning all alone unprotected. He had been shocked when she had confessed that she was lonely. But he would change all that all he wanted was for her to be happy and loved like she deserved. But first he had to know her past. He couldn't help heal the scars if he didn't know what caused them. He would ask her in the morning. He was in love! He closed his eyes with a smile on his face and dreamed of all he wanted. Nancy.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Morning broke and Nancy stirred with a groan and a curse for her aching head.  
"Morning" The cheery voice came from the other side of the room  
"oh…yeah .. god!" She lifted her head saw his smiling face and collapsed back to the pillow and tried to let sleep overcome her once more. But once more his cheery voice cut through her groggy state.  
  
"Nancy who's Bill?"  
He had asked her as if he was asking what day it was but she was imediately awake and sitting up her hung over forgotten.  
"What?"   
"Last night you called me Bill and begged me not to thrash you again, who was he? Was he a… a pimp of yours?"  
"No!" She shouted the word. She hadn't intended to but the thought of Bill being likend to a pimp made her feel ill.  
"Ok I got that wrong then. So who was he?"  
"Does it matter?"  
"Nancy if he mattered to you then it matters to me" he paused and looked at her, she seemed to be having some inward struggle with herself.  
"Bill is… was my lover. Well I was his it all depends on how you look at it."  
  
Then it was as if a gateway opened inside her and the whole story of him and her poured out. The meeting, that night down by the canal when she had got drunk and he had taken his belt to her. The fights about babes. And the good times. When he had bought her boots and a new shawl one Christmas, and the time they went to the music hall. Each time she told him a good memory her face lit up and her eyes sparkled and even with the bad memories he could see she was happy just talking about him and his heart sank.  
  
"So then I met you and here we are."  
"You still love him don't you?"  
"No" she lied. This man had been so kind so gentle she had seen the way he had looked at her she had no right to break his heart.   
"Any love I had for Bill left me when I found out he was married. I had trusted him with my life and to lie…like that it was to much for me to bear."  
"Do you… do you think your heart will mend?" He looked her in the eye and hoped she would get the jist of what he was asking.  
"I think it will. With the right person around." She cared for Nicholas deeply and knew her chance with Bill had gone. She would be content with Nicholas. She may not be able to give him the love he wanted or deserved but she could try and she knew he would love her unconditionally. Wasn't that what she wanted?  
  
Nicholas took her hands in his own "Nancy would you…oh God" his face went pale and his heart was leaping around in his chest "I love you... Would you marry me?" Please say yes he thought he had never prayed so hard in his life.  
  
"Yes I will"then as an after thought she added "I love you too"  
  



	15. Chapter 14

Chapter 14  
  
The wedding was a small affair with the students for witnesses bar Grantaire who turned up at the reception. Nancy wore a cream dress that went down to the floor. She didn't have a veil but wore a ring of posies in her hair.  
  
She didn't know how to feel. She was happy but at the same time sad as she knew after this day that all hope of being with Bill at all would be lost. God she loved him so much it hurt! She looked at the man beside her who was beaming with happiness. She couldn't go back to Bill even if she wanted to. She did not want to put Nicholas through the pain of losing someone he loved. It wasn't fair she reflected. She had been given this chance by fate to better herself and she should take it. Even if she was not completely grateful.   
  
Nicholas thought his heart would burst. Nancy looked as pretty as a picture next to him and he was so proud that she was his he wanted to show her off, to shout at the would that she was now his wife! He must have done something right in his life to deserve this. He couldn't wait to go home and honor their wedding vows. And she loves me too, he thought, she really does. He gazed down at his bride again and smiled, she smiled back. If Nicholas hadn't been so besotted he would have seen that the smile wasn't completely a true one.  
  
  
  
Finally the day drew to a close and they went home.  
  
"So Mrs. Nancy Feuilly" smiled as he said it and pulled her onto his lap "Name sits well don't you think?"  
  
"Very" She didn't think so at all but she had made up her mind she would play happy little wife to him to make him happy and hope he could not see past the fakeness.  
  
He took her to the bed and although his passion heightened and he was fulfilled she felt none of it. It was as if he was another punter. Her body was crying out to be satisfied but it was still completely numb. But due to her old occupation she hid the fact that she felt nothing from him.  
  
He fell asleep in her arms content and happy. She lay awake and cried quietly for her aching heart and body.  
  
  
  
  
  
After 3 months of wedding bliss for Nicholas and heartache for Nancy she finally accepted that this would be her life and there was nothing she could do about it.   
  
It wasn't that she didn't love Nicholas, she did but not with the passion she had felt for Bill it was more of a love you share with a friend. Still it wasn't all bad it could be worse she could be on the streets again and he never mistreated. In fact they never argued and it infuriated her. Some times she would try to goad him into a fight to get rid of her pent up emotions but he was so bloody democratic he never raised his voice to her let alone his hand. So she settled for what she got and stopped trying to draw him into fights and just blocked out her emotions. Everything she gave him was fake. The smiles, the laughs, the passion, the love and he thrived on it all. She had confessed to him that she believed she couldn't conceive but even that didn't bother him. Maybe if she had a child it would be different but she knew it wouldn't happen.  
  
  
  



	16. Chapter 15

Chapter 15  
  
Another 6 months had past and Nancy was doing the usual chores about the house for the day when there came a knock at the door.   
  
Thinking it was Nicholas and that he had forgotten his key she smiled to herself and went to open the door.   
  
The smile faded the moment the door opened and she was confronted by Bill.  
  
His face broke out in a smile and he reached out for her.  
  
She didn't smile. Despite the joy her heart felt at just seeing him again.  
  
""I found ya! I dunno where you got to gal but by God I'm pleased to see you!"  
  
Well….you'd best come in hadn't you.  
  
"Well I gotta say you've done well for yourself." He said looking round at the smart and tidy room the she and Nicholas owned.  
  
"Bill…Bill you can't do this."  
  
Confussion crossed his face. Had he not searched high and low for high all over France for her for almost a year? And now she was saying she didn't want him? What was wrong with her?  
  
"Do what?"   
  
"This! Just turn up as if you have never been gone and nothing has changed because it has."  
  
He laughed so that was it she thought things had changed between them. She continued speaking as he moved towards her.  
  
"For a start you're married." She started to back away from him she knew if he touched her she would succumb to the need to be in his arms.  
  
"No I ain't I left didn't I to find you."  
  
"But you are still married. So am I!"  
  
He stopped dead in his tracks.  
  
"See things have changed. Just coz you ain't with me didn't mean me life stopped." She sat on the bed and he sat down next to her.  
  
Nicholas was home early. He was glad that he was he loved spending time with Nancy. He came to the door and noticed it was open. H heard her voice. Then he heard a mans voice. He stopped next to the door out of site of the people inside.  
  
  
  
"Well who is he?"  
  
"His name is Nicholas. He is lovely so caring and he has been so good to me Bill"  
  
At the sound of his name and her description Nicholas smiled but at the sound of the other mans his heart sunk.  
  
"Sounds like a good bloke. So you love him do you?"  
  
"No" She said the answer so flat so honest.   
  
Nicholas's heart then broke. He had been so sure, how could he have been so blind?!  
  
"But you love me don't you Nance? So what's stopping you from coming with me? We could leave go back to England to London"  
  
"No I can't"  
  
"But you don't love him!" He shouted at her and Nancy flinched.  
  
"But what right have I got to break his heart?! None! I have no right! It isn't fair on him after all he has done some repayment!"  
  
She was screaming at him the anger, love and hate she felt towards him, Nicholas and herself poured out.  
  
Nicholas heard none of it though. The only thought that was going round in his head was that she didn't love him. The whole time she had lied.   
  
Nicholas was bought back to reality and carried on listening.  
  
"Nance" Bill said in a calm voice although he didn't feel calm at all "Nance I couldn't bare to lose ya. It would drive me mad to think you shared another blokes bed."  
  
"And how do you think I felt Bill when I found out about you and that girl? You lost me right then and there. No" she shook her head more to convince herself then to emphisize her point o Bill "No I can't leave, I won't leave I have given myself to him in church and I will honor my vows. He deserves to be happy."  
  
"And what about you? Don't you deserve to be happy?"  
  
"It would seem fate don't want me to be don't it? Goodbye Bill. Don't come back. Ever."  
  
He couldn't believe what she was saying. He would be back. He would change her mind.  
  
"That's it then? No hug? Not even any tears?"  
  
"I don't have any tears left to cry. You caused too many" He let out a sigh and she turned away towards the window and with that he left. Nancy was feeling dead inside  
  
  
  
Nicholas's feelings matched Nancy's. Bill left striding past him not even seeing Nicholas in the doorway. So this was the other man who held her heart so he could not reach it.  
  
He would never let her know he had heard her confession.  



	17. chapter 16

Chapter 16  
  
Nicholas carried on as he always had. The besotted doting husband. But the spark and joy of being with her had gone and she didn't even notice. His friends did though. Their companion was no longer bounding around like a young man in love but had the look of a man who had suffered a great loss.  
  
Enjolras banged his fist on the table to get their attention. All eyes were on him.  
  
"My comrades the day we thought would never come is here! Finally we can fight for our freedom!" A Cheer went up from them all bar one.  
  
"Don't you mean die for our freedoom?"  
  
"Grantaire our lives don't count now it is for the republic and the freedom of France that we fight for now and if we die, we die knowing that we made a difference!" Another cheer went up and then men departed in high spirits Nicholas included.  
  
Nicholas temporailly forgot his miserey and went home feeling exciting finally some action! He opened the door and the joy of seeing her entered his heart. She may have lied but he could not stop his emotions. He ran towards her and twirled her in his arms leaving her a bit taken aback.  
  
"Finally there is to be a Revolution! We are to fight!" she saw his eyes were dancing and she couldn't believe what she was hearing.  
  
"You mean you are to die!" Despite everything Nicholas was a true friend for Nancy.  
  
"If we die it will be a for a good cause"  
  
"What cause would that be then?? The we are bored so lets have a war cause?! Why are men obsessed with war games?"  
  
"This isn't a game!" He was shouting now "We fight for freedom, to let people in poverty lead better lives"  
  
"Oh yes they will all lead great lives with no fathers, brothers and husbands!" Her voice had risen to match his own shouting.   
  
He couldn't believe this! The one thing he cared about and she was calling it a game! All the hate he felt for her that had been building up since her confession poured out.  
  
"Yes they will do very well when we over throw the king and everything will be equal between us!"  
  
"Overthrow the…. Listen to yourself! You will have what a couple of guns? They will have cannons , they will blast you out of the sky!"  
  
"And so what if I am blasted out of the sky?" Go on say it he thought say you love me  
  
"Do you think I have no heart? I couldn't cope if you died you know I care for you."  
  
"Bu you don't love me do you?" His question was uttered quietly and all thoughts of revolution went out the window.  
  
"Of course I do."  
  
"No more lies. No more do you hear me? I know Nancy!"  
  
"Know what?" Even as she said it she knew exactly what he meant.  
  
"I know that you don't love me. I heard you say it to… to him. Why? Why lie about something like that?"  
  
"I … I didn't want to hurt you."  
  
"Hurt me? And how do you think I feel now? I'll tell you what I feel."  
  
He walked towards her and she held his gaze. He bought his face close to hers and wispered "I feel betrayed. I gave you everything and yet you did not love me. All this time I thought your feelings were the same as mine. Am I so unloveable? Or can you not let the love you have for Bill go? I heard you say you didn't love him either but that was a lie too wasn't it? I can see it in your eyes. I … I don't want you to be unhappy with me if you love him go to him. You are right the revolution most certainly means death. But if you don't love me and   
I can't make you happy like a husband should then to me my life is worthless."  
  
"Nicholas…I…" The tears flowed down Nancy's checks. What had she done? She longed to wrap her arms around him. To comfort him to tell him she loved him but she couldn't  
  
"I… I can't help the way my heart feels. It's not your fault and you are in no way a bad husband it's just that I think now I am incapable of love. Any woman would be glad to have you, would love you back as much as you love them."  
  
His eyes were misting over   
  
"Any woman but you, and you are the only one I want."  
  
She wiped the tear away from her eyes, annoyed that she should feel so deeply for him but not as deeply as he wanted her to.  
  
"Nicholas I am no good, I seem to ruin everything I touch, me, Bill…you something always go wrong in everything I do. I don't know why I think maybe I am paying for my sins her on earth rather then later in life. You would be happier and better off with out me."  
  
She slipped off the gold band from her finger and put it into his hand.  
  
"Nancy… please…don't leave me…don't do this"  
  
"Don't ask me to stay you know I can't, not now. Good bye Nicholas"  
  
She kissed him one last time , then walked out of his room and out of his life  



	18. Chapter 17

Chapter 17  
  
She had disappeared off the face of the earth Nicholas had wanted to die when she left. He had wanted to not go on anymore, there was no point if she was not there. But then the Revolution had captured his attention although his heart had not been in it. He was now in the process of searching France. But she was not here. His next stop was England.  
  
Bill couldn't believe that she had just vanished into thin air. He had hung around the flats where he had found her last time but she wasn't there. He had got word to Fagin to tell him his plans and was now sitting in a sorry excuse for a pub waiting for the fence.   
  
Finally he saw Fagin's skeleton like body make its way between the tables to where he sat.  
  
Fagin observed the young man opposite him. He had been informed about Nancy and how her life had gone. Bill was not the same since she had left. He looked tired, worn out. She had bought life into him, she was the compassionate side to him, without Nancy Bill Sikes was just another cracksman.  
  
"Glad to see you looking so well my dear!"  
  
"Oh shut up Fagin I didn't ask you here for how are you's and to tell you what a wonderful day it is and all that crap!"  
  
Bill's temper was sharp and short since Nancy had left. Not that it had been good before hand, observed Fagin.  
  
"No, no of course not my dear I should think the nature of the visit was business of some kind?"  
  
"It's about Nance you old fool. She ain't anywhere to be found and the only place I can think of is London." Bill glared at Fagin waiting for a reaction of some kind.  
  
"London? You really think she would go there? I mean where would she go??"  
  
"Well I don't bloody well know do I? Maybe she has saunted off to Brownlow's the little jade but she is there I knows it and I'm gonna find her."  
  
"So why do you need me then my dear? Surely you can't want me to go with you? Not now Bill, I have a nice little business 'ere I don't want to leave just yet and-"   
  
"Stop your belly aching would you Fagin it ain't you I want you think I wanna be saddled with you for god knows how long? No thank you very much! It's Dodger I'm after he up to it you think?"  
  
"Dodger?" What was going round in Bill's head? Dodger would be more then grateful to leave he had got in with the Patron Minette and had confessed to Fagin one drunken night that Montparnasse had taken a shine to Nance, three days latter Bill had found her in the street. Didn't take a genius to work out what had happened.  
  
"Well?!" Bill's voice grated through Fagin's thoughts.  
  
"Well? Oh yes my dear Dodger would be glad to go back to London…what would you need him for?"  
  
"That's for me to know and you to wonder. Have him meet me 'ere tonight."  
  
With that Bill dismissed Fagin, so Fagin took his leave and left Bill with his thoughts.  



	19. Chapter 18

Chapter 18.  
  
Nancy felt like she had never left. Walking up Little Saffron Hill bought the Three Cripples, their…her regular into veiw.  
  
She opened the door to the pub, she had not been here for over a year but nothing had changed.  
  
She waltzed straight over to the bar, the first thing she would get was a large proper London gin  
  
He was still there! "Hullo Barney I'll have me usual"  
  
"Miss Nancy! I ain't seen you for ages or Bill how are you both?"  
  
"I'm fine as for Bill I have no idea we ain't together no more." She paused and Barney, who had known Nancy since she was 5 and was dragged into this awful underworld in which he lived, saw the fliker of sadness cross her face "I had meself a little holiday with Fagin and the others…well all bar Charley"  
  
"Yeah we heard about Charley still he is on the mend…slow thought it were but he-"  
  
"He's alive? I kinda got the impression that that wasn't what Bill had…I mean it wasn't intended to be like that."  
  
"Well there was a raid weren't there and this toff found Charley and took him home."  
  
Nancy knew that the "toff" was Mr Brownlow and she was glad. Glad that Charley got a bit of happiness and love. With the thought of happiness and love the image of Nicholas had entered her mind. She thought of him a lot. She had been in England for two months and finally decided to go back to her old haunts to see if she could find Bet, Toby and some of the others she had left behind that fateful night a year ago.  
  
"So 'ow is everyone then? Bet and Toby for a start." Suddenly behind her a chorus of sailors started singing a sea shanty brining the pub to life "God it's great to be back!"  
  
"Bet will be glad to see yer"  
  
"What about her? How is she? I missed her loads, didn't bother to write as Bet can't read nether can Tom so didn't think there was much point. Bet she's got a dozen kids ain't she? She's such a dear I can't wait to see her."  
  
"Well your in luck coz she lives her now in me rooms upstairs- go on up gal surprise her"  
  
She took the stairs two at a time and then she was outside the door of Bet's room. She knocked and waited. It seemed like an age before the door opened. But finally it did and there was her Bet plump and pretty as always.  
  
Bet gasped in surprise when she opened the door. It was really Nancy! She looked so sad, and greif striken she wondered what Bill had done to her where ever they had been. She despised the man with every bone in her body, but because of the happiness she bought Nance she had kept her hate under the surface for her sakes. She looked at the girl now who was like a little sister to her and beamed with joy. "How are you Nancy?"She said with her arms out stretched and welcoming. Nancy finally felt like she was home and fell into Bet's arms sobbing with despair, the despair and pain that she had tried to block out for the past year.  
  
"Nancy? Oh my God please..tell me whats wrong…" Bets heart went out to the girl who was crying in her arms. Something was not right, this wasn't the Nancy she had known, the Nancy she had known had always kept her emotions in check, but now, now Nancy was like a child who had lost a her mother, then Bet suddenly realized. Not a child who had lost its mother but a woman who had lost her lover. Why else would she be back looking so distruaght and unhappy?  
  
"He left you then?" she said simply. She felt sorry for Nance but couldn't say she was sad it had happened.  
  
"Yeah he bloody well left me" she cried "He not only left me but was married and had been for quite a while!" she paused to wipe the tears away "Then he came back and I left him coz I got knapped, I were so close to having a babe Bet it was like 'eaven!" Again the tears began to spill down her cheeks "I could feel it you know, but then it were gone again, just like all the others I had lost you would of thought I would have learnt how to cope wouldn't you?"  
  
"Nance… you don't get over something like-" she cut Bet off unable to stop the words coming out of her mouth. She wanted some one else to tell her everything was going to be fine, wanted some one to share the heartache with.  
  
"Then I met Nicholas, dear sweet Nicholas who had loved me like I'd never been loved before. God Bet he was so good to me! He married me," seeing Bet's look of surprise she added "Yeah I'm a married woman now you know, he even didn't mind that I was unable to give him children. And do you know what I did to repay him? I broke his heart!" She cried with renewed bitterness. "Bill showed up and Nicholas over heard me saying that I didn't love him. But then I told Bill I didn't love him and that I never wanted to see him again. But I do love Bill and now I come to think of it I love Nicholas too for being everything Bill is not and… and… god this is such a mess!" The last words were uttered bearly above a wisper and Nancy stopped crying as suddenly as she began.  
  
"Well, I'll tell you one thing Nance you certainly do know how to make an entrance!" Bet laughed to try and lighten the mood, Nancy smiled but Bet saw the vacant eyes she had seen all them years ago when Bill had saved her from certain death.  
  
"Now Nancy you listen to me, first off you are better without Bill, and before you argue you know it's true and second both Bill and this Nicholas are in France so you can carry on your life without both of them."  
  
Nancy smiled back at Bet. In her head she knew Bet's words were smart but her heart wouldn't accept them. One thing her heart had accepted though was that she was in love with Nicholas.  
  
  
  



	20. Chapter 19

Chapter 19  
  
  
  
The need for Gin consumed Nancy. Bet had said she could stay with her as Tom had died of consumption shortly after she had left. For the first month Bet was glad of Nancy's company it was like old times. The girls would chat until the early hours of the morning but Nancy wasn't how she used to be before she met Bill and even after, she had told Bet the whole story of the past from the moment she had woke up on the boat to when she had left Nicholas.  
  
Bet had listened as a big sister does, she even shed a tear at the end, but Nancy remained blank and unfeeling as if she was giving Bet a quick recount of a day at work, not the harrowing story of how she had loved and lost two men.  
  
Barney got Nancy a job in The Three Cripples as a barmaid and all outward signs showed that she was happy and content. But she was miserable. She felt the great emptiness that she had felt the night she was going to end it all, the same emptiness she had felt on her wedding day and the same emptiness she had felt when she had said goodbye to Bill, and then Nicholas.  
  
It was in the second month that she started drinking. It started of as one glass a night, just to fortify herself she said to Bet  
  
"Well Nance just don't over do it right, you know it don't agree with ya."  
  
"For Gods sakes Bet I ain't a baby if I want to drink I'll drink!"  
  
So she did. The glass a night turned to 3 or 4 glasses and very soon a bottle, Barney caught on and had to let her go.  
  
" I'm sorry Nance but I can't have me staff drunker then the customers, besides you helping yourself is eatin' in to me profits"  
"Well Barney" she slurred, it was only morning and yet she had worked her way through half a bottle already "I shall go, but you know don't come running to me when you realize you have lost the greatest barmaid in the world!" as she said this last bit she threw up her hands in great exclamation and laughed then stumbled out of the pub and on to the street.  
  
  
  
Nicholas had never been out of Paris before let alone France. The sight that greeted him shocked him to the core. At first glance he could have been in Paris but then, examined more closely, he saw the overall dirtiness and grubbiness of the vast city. And so crowded! Paris wasn't exactly spacious he reflected but it was a pretty city, the sight before him was just plain ugly.  
  
He had decided on the spur of the moment, much to his friends disgust, that he would not be able to join the crusade. He had to find Nancy. Despite all that had happened he still loved her and felt like he wasn't complete unless she was near. True she might never accept him into her heart but he had to try. Nicholas looked round the ship observing the other pasangers. One boy particulally stood out. Maybe Nicholas noticed him because he had that same happy-go-lucky look about him as Nancy had had that first night he had seen her in the inn. He turned to his companion it was then Nicholas realized who his companion was.  
  
"Great to be back ain't it Bill? Good ol' Lunnon!"  
"Yeah it ain't half bad" Dodger turned to Bill, this bloke ain't what he used to be he thought.   
"Why did you require me services anyway?"  
"Well you find people don't ya?"  
"Well yeah if I know who I'm looking for."  
"Well who do you think? It's Nance you idiot! This is the only place she could be so here we are and you are gonna find her."  
"But what if…" he hesitated, Bill had a temper he knew for how many blows had he had on this short trip alone? "What if she don't want to be found." He tensed in anticipation, expecting a clip around the head. But nothing.  
"This is me last hope" he said quietly "If…if she ain't bothered with me after this then I'll leave her be"  
  
The sadness in his voice was unmistakable.   
  
So, Nicholas thought, Bill has the same idea as me. I have to get to her first, make her change her mind, no, her heart. But how in God's name would he know where to start? His gaze shifted back to London which was drawing nearer by the second. He was one step closer to having her in his arms again he thought with a smile.  
  
Nancy stared out towards the Thames, the cool breeze did nothing to aid her drunken state and she immediately felt ill and regretted drinking so much, as she did every morning these days.  
  
Her eyes focused on a ship that was pulling up to the Hulk. "Another load of lives for London to ruin" She muttered to the great river "Another ship full of people who will have their lives destroyed or go wrong in some way. Wrong like mine. What went wrong any how? First I have no one then I have two people then again I have no one. It isn't fair." She looked up towards the sky. She had never been a believer of God but she felt she had to blame someone and it was with Him she would lay the blame. "It isn't fair!!" She screamed the statement much to the disturbance of passers-by. Bet was by her side in an instant for these days she was never far away and Nancy couldn't stand it. She felt like she was suffocating, not just from Bet's watchful eye but from the loneliness that was engulfing her more and more everyday.  
  
"Nance?" She felt the arms go round her shoulders in attempt to comfort her once again "Nance what is it love? Come on tell me and we can sort it out."  
"No, no WE can't sort anything out I though, I can sort it all out"  
"What ever do you mean Nance?"  
"Nothing…I… Bet I don't feel to good I think I better go home."  
Bet took the girl home and put her to bed. Nancy closed her eyes but was far from sleep for the plan had all ready formed in her mind. Yes she would sort it all out once and for all.  



	21. chapter 20

Chapter 20  
  
He decided he would go to places she had mentioned when she had told him about Bill that morning…the morning he had asked her to marry him. There were three places he could go, The Three Cripples, Old Nicole Street and Jacobs Island. He thought that a Pub might be a bit easier to find then a street and he had no idea what Jacob's Island was so The Three Cripples it was. And where better to find out where a pub was then from inside another pub?  
  
The Anchor was as good as empty when he went in. Must be too early for drink he mused. At the Musain there had always been drinkers there no matter what time of day it was. True it was usually Grantaire who occupied it but still it was a bit more lively then this. English customs he supposed.  
  
He strode over to the bar. Not an out going person at the best of times, the large man with a jagged scar running from the top to the bottom of his left cheek, needless to say, put Nicholas on edge.  
  
"What can I do for ya mate?" Despite his appearance the barman seemed friendly enough Nicholas thought.  
  
"Well actually I was wondering if you could help me…I was looking for the Three Cripples?"  
  
"Oh your one of them are ya?" The man sneered at Feuilly "If you make your way out of here hail a cab, I'm sure the likes of you can afford it, and ask for little Saffron Hill you can't miss it."  
  
  
  
"Thank… Thank you." Nicholas made his way back into the open air. One of them? The likes of you? What kind of place was this Three Cripples? He had never pressed Nancy about her past or the places she had vacated now he wished he had. He of course knew she had been a…a…lovely lady, he hated thinking of her like that, but that was about it.  
  
So Nicholas hailed a cab, asked for Little Saffron Hill and prayed that he would find her there and that he would not have to venture any further into the London Underworld.  
  
"Right Dodger I'm off to The Cripples, make your way down to Hampton Court then Jacob's Island would you?"  
  
"Why would she go to Hampton Court? It ain't as if anyones gonna be there is it?"  
  
Bill lost what little patients he had left and grabbed Dodger by the collar an shock him roughly "Now you listen to me," he hissed "I dunno where she is but I know where she might of gone so you are gonna go down to Hampton Court and you are gonna look D'yer hear me?" he gave Dodger another shake to make sure he got the message.  
  
"Yeah Bill I got it loud and clear see you in the tavern at 11?" Bill gave a nod and released the boy, Dodger in turn ran down the street at high speed.  
  
Bill stood for a second in the deserted street. He had almost killed the boy right there and then, he would of too if he thought he could of found Nance alone. "Hellfire" he muttered to himself and then took off in the direction of Little Saffron Hill.  
  
  
  
She had to get rid of Bet. How could she do what needed to be done if she was hovering in the background. She decided there was only one thing for it, she would stay sober. By mid morning thought she was shaking with need. But Bet was no where to be seen, Nancy looked around the Cripples and silently said her good byes.  
  
  
  
He entered the pub with fear in his heart. He feared that she would not be there. He feared that she would but wouldn't want him.  
  
He opened the door and was horrified by what he saw. It wasn't that he had led a sheltered life, he was horrified because his dear, sweet Nancy had spent most of her life here. This dark dingy place where there were only cracks for windows and smoke and the stale smell of unwashed bodies hung in the air. Unlike the Anchor this place was buzzing with people, all of which looked miserable.  
  
Once again he was apprehensive about approaching the barman but did so all the same.  
  
"What's your poison?"  
  
"I was after a person rather than a drink. A Miss Nancy?" he knew it was a long shot but who around here would know she was his wife? He had never asked her what her maiden name was.  
  
The Barney shot Nicholas a questioning look "What about her?"  
  
His heart jumped into his throat he knew her! "I was wondering if you knew her whereabouts perhaps?"  
  
Barney regarded the young man opposite him. Another punter no doubt. Nancy always had had a good reputation when it had come to her line of work. He hadn't realized she had gone back on the game but he was a friend so would direct the business her way anytime he could.  
  
"She lives above 'ere but she ain't home at the present. If I where you I'd try down by the river, it's one of her most regular spots, down near the bridge."  
  
Nicholas left the pub as fast as his feet would carry him. Fate had brought them together he thought, how else would he have been so lucky? He smiled at the thought of seeing her and made his way across the main road from Little Saffron Hill towards the Thames.  
  
  
  
Bill made his way up to the door of the Cripples. Nothing had changed n the outside. It was who was inside that was important to him now.  
  
The moment he saw Barney he knew there was hope of finding her.  
  
"Well strike me blind! If it ain't my best customer Bill Sikes! What'll it be then? On the 'ouse of course"  
  
"Not at the moment Barney, though there might be cause for celebration later. You ain't seen Nance recently by any chance 'ave ya?"  
  
"She's in demand today make no mistake! She lives here with Bet, ain't seen her this morning though, try down by the river, her usual patch I'm sure you know the place" he laughed and wondered if Sikes would share the joke but to no avail.  
  
"Cheers Barney" then he was gone.  
  



	22. chapter 21

Chapter 21  
  
This was it. This is how it ends she thought as she peered down into the murky depths of the Thames. How many others had taken the decision? She wondered. Nancy knew she was just putting off the inevitable. It was the right choice she convinced herself. It would be better for everyone if she wasn't around to ruin their lives. She took a step closer to the edge. Had it been only two years ago she had been happy with Bill? Had it only been a year ago she had been married to Nicholas? It all seemed like a lifetime ago. Her lifetime was over now though she knew it was. "Get on with it the you fool" she whispered to herself and took yet another step closer to the beginning of the end. Just one more step and that would be it. Nancy would be no more, I will be no more. She gazed up to the cloudy London sky "Who will be your next victim? Who's life will you toy with next until there is nothing left? Well it won't be mine, I shall entertain you no more oh great one" she uttered mockingly She took a final look around the place she had called home and took the last step she wold ever take.  
  
  
  
  
  
There she was, his Nancy, gazing into the waters edge, they had often walked along the river together in comfortable silence as lovers do. Her lips were moving and she moved closer to the waters edge. He smiled to himself as she gazed up, lips still moving and he wondered what little snippet of the music hall she was singing. Then he watched in horror as she stepped off the edge.  
  
  
  
Bill moved like lightning, his hand shot out like a bullet from a gun as he grabbed her own small one. He pulled her towards him hugging her body to him the fear that she might fall in if he let her go. He would never let her go, not now, not ever.  
  
It had all happened so fast. One moment she was about to plunge into the depths of the Thames and the next she was in his arms, and he was squeezing the life out of her. Then he was kissing her.  
  
Nicholas felt like he had been walking for miles but there was the bridge.  
  
As he got closer to the rivers edge her saw a couple in a passionate embrace and smiled, wondering if Nancy would be as welcoming to him. The lovers pulled apart, the man had his back to him, but the womans face was as clear as day.  
  
She pulled away from Bill, about to smile at him and tell him that he always was in the right place at the right time, when her eyes focused on a figure behind him. Nicholas. Why couldn't things be easy for her? Just for once?  
  
Bill turned to see what had caught her attention and saw a young man and knew in an instant who he was.  
  
Nicholas looked sadly at Nancy "I came to see if you had changed your mind about me. It would seem once again I have made the wrong decision" he turned away from her and walked back the way he came. Why had he ever thought that her feelings would have changed? How could he of been such a fool?  
  
Nancy called out to him, struggling in Bills arms "Nicholas wait please I-"  
  
"Let him go Nance, he just said you've made your choice and you have ain't ya?" Please don't let me lose her again he thought. He held on to her with a vice like grip.  
  
"Bill let me go, you don't understand I have to tell him! If I don't…. please Bill if you love me let me go please…." The pleading look in her eye won him over and with a heavy heart he let go of her arms.  
  
Nicholas made his way back to the main road at the bottom of Saffron Hill. At least now I know he thought. But it didn't do anything to ease the pain he felt. As he crossed the road he heard her.  
  
"Nicholas wait please!"  
  
He shock his head and carried on walking across the road. He had seen enough to know what she felt.  
  
"Nicholas please… I love you!"  
  
He stopped dead in his tracks and turned towards her. She loved him! She loved him! The words went round in his head and he thought his heart would burst!  
  
"NICHOLAS!!!!!" she had screamed the warning but it was too late. The Shire horses trampled his body as if it was a bag of hay.  
  
The horses reared as the driver tried to pull them back. She was beside him in a flash.  
  
"Oh God" the tears rolled down her cheeks as she cradled his head in her lap.  
  
"You love me?" He said huskily, she could hear the blood bubbling in his throat.  
  
"With all my heart"   
  
He smiled then coughed, the blood spilling down his chin. He could see the tall figure of Bill standing behind her and he tried to focus on his face "Make her happy"  
  
Bill looked down at the dying man. It was strange that the man who had kept them apart for so long had brought them together again. He nodded to Nicholas and then placed his hand on Nancy's shoulder.  
  
His vision was going, it was getting dark and he could feel himself choking. But he could still see her face.   
  
"Don't leave me" she sobbed  
  
"Be happy" then he was gone.  
  



	23. Chapter 22

Chapter 22  
  
  
  
He was gone. She looked down at the lifeless body in her arms. She should never of told him, he would of never had stopped if she hadn't told him, the cart never would of…  
  
"Nance?"  
  
She hadn't even realized he was there until he spoke her name. He crouched down beside her and put his arms around her. She slumped against his chest, grateful of the warmth he gave her.  
  
"I killed him" she uttered the three words to Bill, barely above a whisper.  
  
"Don't talk stupid gal, you didn't kill him" This was gonna be hard he knew, Nancy had been strong once but now…one thing was for certain though, he would never leave her again.  
  
"I did Bill, if should never of told him, if I hadn't of told him he would never of stopped and the cart… it never would of…"Again she looked down at Nicholas's body. Apart from the blood that had worked its way down to the front of his shirt, he looked at peace.  
  
"Now you listen to me Nance, if you hadn't have told him he would of spent his whole life feelin'  
  
miserable, but you told him and he died knowing he was loved by you, he died 'appy"   
  
She looked up in to Bill's face "Bill Sikes you must be one of the strangest human beings on the earth" she said with a smile. "And I love you for it" Then she bent her head and Kissed Nicholas's forehead "Goodbye Nicholas I won't ever forget you"  
  
  
  
  
  



	24. Epilogue

Epilogue  
  
Her screams echoed down the hall way as he stood outside the door to their room. Each scream struck fear in his heart. The last five years had been the best of his life, and now at 30 he, Bill Sikes couldn't ask for more.  
  
Nancy and he had loved each other with renewed passion after that fatal day at the bottom of Little Saffron Hill. He had helped her heal and she in turn had made him a better man. True he still had a temper but he had made a conscience effort to control it, he didn't drive her away again.  
  
The last anguished scream came from the room filled with relief.  
  
The door opened and out stepped out the workhouse doctor.  
  
"Congratulations, you have a girl."  
  
Bill paid the doctor and all but ran into the room.  
  
"Bill meet your daughter" Nancy smiled tiredly as she held out the baby to him  
  
Bill took the little squirming baby in his arms, she had Nancy's eyes he thought with a smile.  
  
"Well how does it feel to be a father?"  
  
"Feels… right" he pulled a chair up to the bed and sat down. "'Ere are Nance, bet you can't wait to get your hands on her again"  
  
Nancy sighed "You keep her, I'm tired after all that screaming" she laughed.  
  
"What we gonna call her?"  
  
"Annie"  
  
"Annie? Why Annie?"  
  
"Because that was me mother's name."  
  
  
  
5 years after the death of Nicolas Annie Sikes was born 


End file.
